Tag: life

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life Web Stuff

Pause button….for 20 years.

pause.jpgAhhhh, the Facebook. A place to connect with friends of old and new. A place to see what is going on in your friends life. A place to upload drunk pictures from your phone.

I believe that the greatest aspect to FB is the ability to reconnect with long-lost friends. Over the past year, I have reconnected with the two people (outside of mom and dad) that I have known since I was 4 years old. While not all my relationships go back that far, I have shot over the 400 friend mark thanks in large part to my high school/college friends.

Of course, the first things that you ask each other, “What have you been up to?” Wow, take a second to think about that. If you had not seen someone for 20+ years, how do you summarize you life. Do you simply focus on your personal life? (Got married, have x kids, run marathons) Maybe professional life? (Worked for XYZ Corp, started my own business, etc.) Maybe you just take the highlights of both.

I think what I’m going to do is to write up my bio in short form to be able to let people know what I’m up to. Maybe take a page from Twitter and summarize it in 140 characters. Here’s my first attempt:

SIU grad, worked at bank, went into investments, married Jennifer, one son: Truce(has autism), started Souza Financial, try to write more

That’s 137 characters, enough to fit in a Twitter window. But I didn’t say anything about living in Hoopeston, getting engaged and married on the same day in Las Vegas, my Indians tattoo, anything about my parents or brothers.

I just found an old friend the other day on FB and his question was, “Do you still listen to Anthrax?” Understand that my license plate used to read ANTHRX 2. Boy, hit the pause button for 20 years and that’s what he remembered? It’s who I was, but I almost felt like a sell-out to say that I still like them, but don’t listen on the regular. It’s funny to look back 20 years and think of all that you have been through and to summarize that in 2 or 3 sentences. When I get the 140 character bio perfected, I will post it here.

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Web Stuff

Saturday Night Funny

First, watch the video before you read on….please. It’s well worth the 4:30 minutes.

When I first started to watch this, I thought, “OK, some tool is going to dance at a bunch of different places around the world.” Then, I see everyone else join in, and I was moved. Some guy dancing is one thing, but the joy of everyone else dancing with him, was really cool. I also love the concept. It’ goes back to my love affair with Post Secret. It’s something of an art project, part silly & part inspiring. No matter where you are at in the world there are still things that are universal, dancing is one.

If you read Matt’s bio, you will find that he’s didn’t make his millions off the internet boom and travels around the world. He’s a normal, lazy guy, who fell ass-backwards into this and got the folks at Stride gum to pay for it. Stories like this keep me inspired to find that next, big thing, or die trying.

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Statistics

1/2 of All Marriages Don't Fail! Do the math!

wed.jpg I’m sure that everyone has heard the stat: “50% of all marriages end in divorce.” That statistic has been a pet-peeve of mine for years. It’s completely false and would like everyone that reads this to NEVER use that phrase again, please.

I downloaded several reports from the CDC and the census to get the number of marriages and divorces. Funny, they report the number of marriages (they track it through marriage licenses issued), but they don’t track the total number of divorces. According to the CDC’s National Vital Statistics Report from 2006, there were 2,249,000 marriages. That is a rate of 7.3 per 1000. The total divorces are not given, because they don’t have a way to track it. However, they have a rate of 3.6 per 1000. So, 3.6 is about half of 7.3, so that’s where the 50% (well, almost 50% comes in). So, best I can figure taking 49.3% of 2.249 million is 1,109,095 end in divorce.

So, that’s it? Case closed. The stats prove it, right? Wrong. According to the census, the total number of marriages is about 55.2 million. So, we just established that 1.109 million marriages fail each year for 50% of all marriages to fail 27.6 million couples need to get divorced. Follow me? Each year 2.2 million go into the marriage pool while 1.1 million get out. So, each year we are adding another 1.1 million to the total population of married people.

Think of it this way. The first year, I give you two apples. Half way through the year, I take one away. Now you have one apple. (Am I typing slow enough for you?) The second year, I give you two more apples, for a total of 3. Half way through the year, I take 1 (not 1.5 away). Now, you have 2 apples at the end of the year. Year three, I give you 2 more apples, for a total of 4 and take one away 6 months later. So you end the year with 3. Are you following me here, camera guy?

So, with 55 million marriages in the pool and 1.1 million failing, actually puts the divorce rate at…..(drumroll please)……2% of all marriages fail.

If we used the same 50% logic, then the headlines should read:

56% of All People Die Every Year

Because the rate of births in 2006 were 14.3, while deaths came in at 8.1 or 56%. But see, the 4.3 million people born in 2006 joined the almost 297 million living people in America while 2.4 million went to the big Sham-Wow in the sky.

Like Mark Twain said, “There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.” Comments?

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Autism Big Picture

Why, dad?

why.jpg Why? A question that has been asked for centuries by scientist, philosophers and musicians. But it most often asked by children. If you have a child, you know this question and more than likely you HATE this question. Why do birds have wings? Why is the sky blue? Why do farts smell? Why, why, why?

Truce is not a big fan of the “Why?” question. Through all the advances in communications that Truce has made over the past 3 years, why, eludes him. For him, the whole concept of cause and effect is hard to grasp. Let me give you an example. Let’s say that I am in the other room and I hear a loud crash come from the kitchen. I run in there to see Truce standing above a pile of broken dishes. He will look up and me and say, “What happened?” Yes, he will ask what I should be asking. He’s not asking to be a smart-mouth (like I probably would at his age) he just knows that will be the question I will ask. He’s beating me to the punch.

Truce has come so far. Anyone who knows him will attest to that. Explaining something that happened is the next bridge that I would love for him to cross. The other day at school he was acting up and I asked why. He said, “I sad.” I asked why was he sad. Did someone hurt him, make fun of him, or was he frustrated? Why were you sad, I asked again. He looked at me and I could tell the wheels were turning, but he didn’t have an answer.

Later, I told Jennifer that I wish he could explain things to me. To tell me, why. Like every other wish that I have had for him to this point, he will get it. Of that, I have no doubt. So, for those of you with little ones, think twice before you roll your eyes or sigh the next time they start to go on about why something happened. Just listen to it with a smile and know that you are blessed.

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Big Picture

The Toys "R" Us kids grow up.

kidadult.jpg
Growing up.

When did you realize that you were growing up? Was it when you got married? Had children? Got promoted? For me, it was yesterday. Now, over the past few years most of my wild antics have gone by the wayside. I don’t drink as much as I used to, I don’t do crazy things as much, and I tell my friends to “be careful.” Being President of my Rotary club, serving on city council, and owning my own business has brought me a little more on the strait and narrow.

So why yesterday did I grow up? Actually it didn’t happen yesterday, I just realized it yesterday. I had lunch with an old friend from high school that I had not talked to for about 20 years. The conversation at one point turned to life. We made the joint comment that what used to be important to us: nice car, big house, boat, etc., didn’t mean squat anymore. I’ll stop there for now. Earlier in the day, I had a conversation with my very best friend and we were discussing this same subject. His quote was about the fancy stuff was this: “None of that shit matters. Life is too short to worry about that crap.” Exactly. Finally, this same conversation was played out a week ago when I talked to another good friend of mine. We both agreed “stuff” is fine to have, but serving the greater good and leaving a legacy that can be passed on is more important.

So, three different people, three independent conversations, but the same points: 1. Fancy things are great, but not needed. You need the love of your family, food, and a roof over your head. 2. We desire to do something bigger than ourselves. Give something back to the greater good. 3. Be happy in whatever you do, because life is too short.

How did I realize I grew up? By listening to what we were saying. It wasn’t the talk of how drunk we were going to get or the party that was happening this weekend. It was about adult stuff. Has the economy and it’s troubles caused us to start thinking this way? Maybe. Is it the renewed hope in a new administration running our country? Could be. I think for the most part it just the right time. We have 20+ years of life experience under out belt and are looking at the way we want to see the world for the next 20+.